Pro Wrestling NOAHtry: TJ’s First Attempt

Pro Wrestling NOAH was once a proud wrestling promotion in Japan. They never really recovered though after the in-ring death of Mitsuharu Misawa though and have been in a decline ever since. They are now being run by the red-hot NJPW, and the Suzuki-gun stable from NJPW has been doing a hostile-takeover of the product.

With all that said, it’s time to drum up some excitement for NOAH. What better way to do that than with poetry, by legendary artist, TJ Hawke.

Note from Tom: Hi gang, it’s The Big Dog here. First things first – TJ wrote that introduction himself and he is NOT a legendary artist, so I had to amend it out of respect for the only true legendary artist: Ilyass.

Anyway, his poem isn’t very good but he a) tried his best and b) takes a shot at Taz, so I guess it’s not completely without merit.

The first entry concerns Minoru Suzuki defending the GHC Heavyweight Championship against Yoshihiro Takayama.

GHC title match was fabs.
MiSu sort of has abs.

Taz whines about stolen towels.
MiSu makes lions lose bowels.

Takayama is old as fuck.
Suzuki-gun runs amok.

Don’t miss Suzuki-gun a ton.
Hope they’re sent to the sun.

MiSu causes many scars.
Match is 3 and 1/2 stars.