This Or That (9/30/2014)

Everybody loves binary decisions, especially wrestling fans! In This Or That, we’ve forced ourselves to choose between two options that relate to wrestling.

Over four questions, @TimWelcomed, @JoeySplashwater and @TomBlargh will have to choose one of two options and give their reasoning on each of their choices. You can then vote on which one you’d choose, giving you the false impression that you’re somehow involved and we care about your opinion chance to join the conversation!

Before we start, here’s last week‘s results:

Who will have more WWE World Heavyweight title reigns in 2015?

Roman Reigns – 58%, Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins COMBINED – 42%

More likely to be running shows this time next year?

TNA – 76%, Global Force Wrestling – 24%

Better feud for Bray Wyatt going forward?

Dolph Ziggler – 53%, Big Show – 47%

Better vegetable?

Broccoli – 59%, Lettuce – 41%

Who will face Seth Rollins in the Cell: John Cena or Dean Ambrose?

Rumor has it Cena vs. Ambrose kicks off Hell In A Cell. Winner faces Seth Rollins in the main event inside the cage. Loser would face Randy Orton later on.

Tim:

I’d gladly go do other things during another Orton vs Cena match if it meant Ambrose’s momentum stays intact and we get a Ambrose vs Rollins Hell In A Cell match out of it. I mean, with Cena being a stand-up guy and a knowledgeable veteran with some pull he would probably tell WWE management that he needs to lose to Ambrose at this juncture and use his powers to do the right thing for the future. RIGHT??

Dean Ambrose

Joey:

It’s very difficult to imagine Cena going on three PPV’s in a row without a victory, especially coming off the Summerslam demolishing by Brock Lesnar. The booking history dictates that he gets some big wins back but man, Dean Ambrose’s momentum is way too hot to stop.

It feels like Ambrose is on the precipice of something special and he needs one more really strong performance as a “star making night” to get to the next level. Beating the top guy in the company and then his arch rival who has had his number inside Hell In A Cell would be that. Plus, the rumor of the loser facing Orton would give you the out of Cena destroying Orton. It can and will work out where Dean Ambrose faces Seth Rollins inside that Cell.

Dean Ambrose

Tom:

I want to pick Dean Ambrose, but given that’d likely result in YET ANOTHER Cena/Orton PPV match, I can’t go that direction. It’s too unthinkable.

John Cena

Who will retire first: Kane or Big Show?

WHEN WILL THEY GO AWAY!

Tim:

Kane seems to have a role outside of the ring as a corporate stooge that I could possibly see extending past this current storyline if he decides to stop actually wrestling or whatever it is that he calls what he does when he’s walking around in the ring. He could be a really boring general manager or something. I can see Big Show finally hanging up the boots within the next two years and I wouldn’t be upset by it one bit.

Big Show

Joey:

Kane is older and has wrestled longer so you’d think it would be him with quick thinking but if you look at it, Kane barely takes any bumps and is basically used as an on screen character more than a wrestler these days despite him having a bigger role with all the injuries. Big Show already left wrestling once and I think he’d be more likely to leave it again first. Plus he has the comedic timing and personality to have a chance in the acting world.

Big Show

Tom:

Yeah, Kane seems like he’s in it for the long haul, regardless of audience interest or personal ability. Big Show seems much more prepared to step away, so I’m hoping ‘Big Nasty’ Paul Wight does the honourable thing and fucks off for a life of cameoing in shitty Adam Sandler films.

Big Show

Which wrestling product would you rather try: DDP Yoga or JR’s BBQ sauce (and other condiments)?

Which piques your interest more?

Tim:

I really would like to give DDP Yoga a try. I figure it’ll be a little more stressful than yoga should be but I’m willing to give it a go. On the other hand I love mustards and JR’s Main Event Mustard sounds like my kind of condiment. I’ve always wanted to try his sauces. In the end, I’d much rather support DDP than Jim Ross and I’d probably feel a little better about myself too.

DDP Yoga

Joey:

I have huge doubts that DDP Yoga is anywhere near fulfilling as traditional forms of yoga. If I had to choose one, it would be the Jim Ross BBQ sauce and ketchup. Jim’s smashing cookbook ‘Can You Take The Heat’, featured on our lovely site has been a great source of entertainment for me over the years.

JR’s BBQ

Tom:

I’ve already tried JR’s BBQ sauces and they’re really pretty solid! The actual BBQ sauces are probably my least favourite of the various options – they’re not bad, but the chipotle ketchup is very tasty and the ‘Main Event Mustard’ is really tangy and good, even despite the kinda cringey name.

I’m casually interested in DDP Yoga. I find DDP as a human to be pretty impossible to listen to, but he does seem genuinely passionate about what he does. However, food will always win over exercise so suck my dick, DDP Yoga.

JR’s BBQ

Who reigns supreme: Beyoncé or Rihanna?

Hard hitting question of the week.

Tim:

I see it as Beyoncé will pretty much be a classic that will eventually transcend fads and being relegated to a certain time while Rihanna will be someone we think about when looking back at the music of a certain period.

Rihanna has had some earworm-worthy songs but she doesn’t have anything that I see being considered classic… or to the extent of Beyonce’s offerings throughout her career.

Beyoncé

Joey:

In the words of Michael Scott, it’s “Beyoncé, ALWAYS!”

Beyoncé’s star power is one of a kind and Rihanna isn’t in her league. This is like comparing The Rock to Dolph Ziggler. YEAH, I SAID IT.

Beyoncé

Tom:

Sadly, as much as I like a few of Rihanna’s songs, my main woman Beyoncé is pretty unbeatable right now. As a result, I’m gonna make it more interesting and judge them on their merits as actresses.

Beyoncé was in a terrible Austin Powers film, although she was probably one of the better bits about it. She was also in some crappy looking CGI kids film voicing some kind of fairy forest queen. ‘Epic’? Was that what it was called? Also, can I take a break just to say how bullshit it is when big deal grown-up celebrities are cast as voice actors in kid’s films? It’s almost always lame. Dreamworks are the main offenders, since Pixar tends to at least have some thought behind all their casting choices rather than just “OH WOW THEY’RE FAMOUS”.

Meanwhile, Rihanna had a funny cameo in ‘This Is The End’ with Mikey Cera and also appeared in the terrific ‘Battleship’. I’ve not seen the latter, but the bit in the trailer where she says “mahalo, motherfucker” made me laugh so old Ri-Ri takes it home.

Rihanna