Superhero Survivor Series: Round Four

    • Superhero Survivor Series: Round Four

      We’re bored of wrestling so we came up with a new feature to let us go on about superheroes and comics instead. Welcome to Superhero Survivor Series!

      Each of our panel members was tasked with drafting their dream team of superheroes for a classic 5-on-5 Survivor Series match.

      Making their picks in the following order will be:

      You can see the introduction and rules here. The picks so far are:

      Round One: Arrow, The Incredible Hulk, Captain America, Guy Gardner (Red Lantern)Animal Man.
      Round Two: Master ChiefSupermanNightcrawlerVenom (Flash Thompson)Stardust the Super Wizard.
      Round Three: KatoSpider-ManSpace GhostStormThe Punisher.

      Let the fourth round begin!

      Superhero Survivor Series: Round Four

      Brad’s pick: COLOSSUS


      I feel that Colossus will work great alongside Master Chief. Both guys have the durability to outlast a war, the Chief with his Mark armor and Colossus with the abilty to turn into organic steel.

      Colossus’ abilty of super human strength will combat the Hulks and Things of the world. Colossus is also a trained swordsman so his close range combat skills will match up well with Arrow and Kato. Colossus also posseses the skill of being a trained acrobat, making him not only hard to destroy but hard to attack.

      Joey’s pick: SQUIRREL GIRL


      I love squirrels and Squirrel Girl is just the most adorable superhero character. I’m currently writing a screenplay for Squirrel Girl starring Zooey Deschanel as Squirrel Girl and Brad Ward as supervillain Materialistic Man, coming to the big screen in 2019.

      Squirrel Girl and Spider-Man will give us the tag team of cute New York-centric superheroes using their speed and “forgotten animal” bond.

      Tim’s pick: BIG BARDA


      Big Barda is the muscle of my team. Her divine powers such as energy manipulation, flight, and teleportation paired with her super strength, heightened sense, and master of weapons leaves her a force to be reckoned with. So, yeah… she’s a badass and she’s on my Superhero Survivor Series team.

      Nightife’s pick: LOCKJAW


      Lockjaw, former leader of the Pet Avengers and first dog of Attilan, might seem like an unusual choice at first, but his powers of teleportation (himself and others) brings a LOT to the table. Anywhere that this team wants to go, they can go, thanks to Lockjaw. Tough opponent? Lockjaw can teleport him to Mars. I’d be an idiot not to pick him.

      Tom’s pick: THE SILVER SURFER


      Like Stardust the Super Wizard, The Silver Surfer is ungodly powerful thanks to his possession of the power cosmic, gifted to him by Galactus, Devourer of Worlds. That alone should make him the perfect pick for any team. Unfortunately though, he’s also the biggest jabronie mark in all of comics – despite having all this power, he frequently gets punked out by lesser individuals because he’s too busy whining and philosophising about things.

      My favourite example of the Surfer’s hopelessness is the issue where he loses his powers and has to go get a job. SPOILERS: IT WENT REALLY BADLY:

      “The Surfer has been standing in the employment line for 14 hours before he is finally seen by someone. It is revealed without his Power Cosmic he has no skills for this world. He is given a job in construction doing manual labor but cannot perform the job, his silver skin heating his core and he does not have the power to cool himself down. He is fired on the first day.”

      The Silver Surfer: confirmed as unemployable.

      Anyway, why would I have such a hopeless sap on my team? Simple, because he’ll make the rest of my guys feel better about themselves. Every team needs a punk, it’s good for morale. Just as the Four Horsemen needed a Paul Roma, my team needs The Silver Surfer.

      – If you want to hurl abuse at our draft pickers, you can find them on Twitter at @BradFGN, @JoeySplashwater, @TimWelcomed, @AnimeKing420 and @TomBlargh. Please don’t though, they’re trying their best. Check back Wednesday for the last round!


Leave a Reply