Many sites have a match of the week but ours is a little different. These matches are the ones that are fun to watch… in the non-traditional way.
This week, we’ve decided to make up for the last few weeks without a Match of the Week by having THREE matches. And ALL are celebrating Crash Holly. That’s right. Three Crash Holly matches. You’re welcome! Members of the site @TimWelcomed, @typicalROHfan and @TomBlackett give their (lack of) expertise on the action.
Part 1: Crash Holly vs. Tazz
Tazz, being the bully that he is, controls Crash Holly from the beginning, immediately taking him to the back because why wrestle in the ring if you do not have to? Tensai and a member of The Shield appear until Tazz throws Tensai into a freezer where he would freeze until being thawed out years later. Tazz was too busy trying to bully around a lot of people instead of just his opponent leading to him getting blindsided by a fire extinguisher and a 2X4 from Crash Holly who then gets the win.
Crash returns to the ring to celebrate. Then we see him explain the 24/7 rules. Then we get the pay-off by seeing him explain that the belt was under 24/7 rules again but this time in denim overalls! As he leaves The Mean Street Posse attacks him but they fight among themselves too much to accomplish anything.
Look at this goon Tazz rushing Crash Holly. Let the guy into the ring, jerk! I love how Michael Cole refers to Tazz of the two as the “overachiever.” The fight gets intense backstage.
Hey, look! WWE Superstar Tensai is running laps backstage as part of his cardio and this asshole Tazz pushes him into the wall and starts hitting him with a wrench for no reason whatsoever. Big Boss Man arrives to arrest Taz. Hooray, justice! Wait, what… Tazz throws Boss Man into a freezer. This vandal must be stopped!
Crash stands tall and defeats the scumbag bully. What a valiant hero. Crash then chats up Lillian Garcia and survives a fight with the Mean Street Posse. Normal day in the life of Crash, as we’ll see more of.
WELL, IF IT ISN’T MY UNFASHIONABLE NEMESIS TAZZ. The two start crowd brawling, which maybe isn’t the best idea for two guys of their stature because they get lost immediately. Things soon go backstage though, and it all feels very reminiscent of how you could take a fight to the back in WWF No Mercy for the N64. Remember that? Power bombing guys through that one table in the changing room? Great times.
King takes a shot at Brooklyn and the ‘seedy apartment buildings’ that Tazz probably grew up in and… wait, that’s more a shot at Tazz, isn’t it? You get him, King! Prince Albert shows up, Crash gets locked in a freezer, Big Bossman turns up and OH MY GOD why is the Hardcore Title still not in existence? Crash wearing dungarees at the end is completely perfect, even as the Mean Street Posse accost him in the parking lot.