Wrestling On Earth Logo
  • Wrestling On Air
  • Merch Table
  • Dirt Sheet History
  • Sexy Wrestler
  • ScoopZone
  • More Things
  • The Merch Table: What The Fuck, Paige Fans

    Wrestling companies make merchandise. It’s usually pretty bad, but sometimes, it’s terrible. Welcome to The Merch Table.

    Every so often, @TomBlargh will look at some of the awful merch that someone expects you to buy. Up this time: What The Fuck, Paige Fans.

    Just a short one this week. I was on the WWE Auctions site today, which is a testament to just how terrible wrestling fans are with money. You’ve got people spending $360 on a used chair, over $700 on a director’s slate, and $310 on pieces of a broken table (the last of which would be seen as ACTUAL GARBAGE in pretty much any other industry aside from wrestling).

    However, nothing compares to the money being splashed around by Paige fans, who I’m now convinced are all absolute fucking psychopaths. You’ll see what I mean. LET’S GET STARTED.

    Paige signed t-shirt

    Alright, cool. It’s a Paige t-shirt – not one she wore or anything, just one she signed. Typically, these go for between $100 and $200 on the WWE Auctions site. How much do you think Paige’s went for?

    paige-shirt

    YEAH. YEAH. $2,010. WE’RE NOT FUCKING AROUND HERE. Let’s have a look at the heroes who were bidding on this incredible collectible:

    shirt-bids

    Nhronis is setting the pace here as the number one connoisseur of Paige collectibles. Do you think we’ll see him dominate the rest of the listings… or will a challenger emerge?

    Paige painting

    Screen Shot 2014-09-05 at 18.18.32

    Okay, Rob Schamberger painting. Pretty neat – it’s not that huge or anything and, again, these things tend to go for between $100 and $200. Think we’ll see Paige’s go for something similar?

    paige-paintingNOPE, IT WENT FOR TWO THOUSAND, NINE HUNDRED AND NINETY DOLLARS. WHAT. Who could have been competing for this incredible piece of art?

    painting-bidsHMM, INTERESTING. We see Nhronis show up again, but he’s clearly not as dedicated as the hot, new contender Nasser. Surely these two can’t have the funds to afford more high-end Paige auction items though… can they?

    Paige signed Divas replica title belt

    Screen Shot 2014-09-05 at 18.18.41

    A Divas title belt. These already go for a few hundred bucks, and generally, the signature will add another couple hundred on WWE Auctions. For Paige though… I mean, I think it’s been well-established that all logic goes out the window with her stuff, so I couldn’t even begin to guess.

    paige-belt

    Sure, $4,500. That makes sense. That makes so much sense. I can’t even comprehend money anymore. Can you guess the individuals who were driving up the price of this prestigious item?

    belt-bids

    YEAH, FUCKING SHOCKER. Another decisive victory for Nasser, and honestly, Nhronis is really going to have to get back in the game if he wants to be in the running to be considered number one creepy Paige fan. There’s only one round left but… man, it’s a big one.

    Worn Paige t-shirt

    Screen Shot 2014-09-05 at 18.18.22

    God damn it. God fucking damn it. Here’s the deal – if you have a serious interest in owning a worn item of clothing by ANYONE, I’m going to be somewhat suspicious about your motivations. When it’s a lady wrestler? Forget it, I’m going to petition that you be placed on every list and register I can find.

    Clearly, this was going to be big news for the Paige fans. Other items of worn clothing have gone for around $400/500. For Paige’s worn t-shirt though? It gets INSANE.

    paige-signed-shirt

    FUCK THIS. FUCK WRESTLING FANS. Let’s see who won this bidding war:

    worn-shirt-bids

    Congratulations, Nasser, you are confirmed as the ultimate creepy Paige fan. I hope you enjoyed spending $13,500 on a torn-up t-shirt, a small painting and a replica title belt and that you’re never allowed within 500 yards of Paige!

    – @TomBlargh WILL return with another new Merch Table at some point in the future. Until then, be sure to tweet him @TomBlargh or e-mail us at wrestlingonearth@gmail.com with any terrible merch scoops. Want more Merch Table? You can check out our archive of past Merch Tables here.
    This entry was posted in More Things!, The Merch Table and tagged Paige, The Merch Table, wrestling fans on September 5, 2014 by Tom B.

    Post navigation

    ← ROH All Star Extravaganza VI Predictions and Preview
    IMPACT In 5 Pictures Or Less (9/4/2014) →

    7 thoughts on “The Merch Table: What The Fuck, Paige Fans”

    1. Bruce Kraft September 6, 2014 at 2:23 am

      OK seriously, this was one of the funniest articles I have read in FOREVER lol Great job man, good job on the research too

    2. Steve September 6, 2014 at 11:43 am

      “Your bids are in red. (Hide)”

      I’m trying to figure out why it looked like Nhronis and Nasser kept upping their own bids, driving the price up for no reason.

      Clearly other people were bidding as well, but you’ve chosen to hide their bids for some reason……

      1. tomblargh Post authorSeptember 6, 2014 at 12:03 pm

        OH WOW A CONSPIRACY??!?!!! Nope, didn’t hide anything, just took a screenshot of the top bids on each item. For example, you can see bid history here: http://auction.wwe.com/iSynApp/auctionDisplay.action?auctionId=225507#bid-history

      2. tomblargh Post authorSeptember 6, 2014 at 12:08 pm

        (And the reason it looks like they’re outbidding themselves is because of the weird way WWE presents it – where Nasser wins with 6,010, even though it looks like the three bids before are all Nhronis bidding against himself, I think that’s just Nasser pushing him up to the limit before he finally overtakes him.)

      3. SharkOnMars September 6, 2014 at 11:31 pm

        Go ahead, Steve. Try to suck the fun out of the room. You can’t do it!

    3. themosayat September 7, 2014 at 6:03 am

      Meh… I guess the past merch table articles set the bar so high, and you guys hyped this one too much for it to meet my expectations. It was very good, don’t get me wrong, but the fact that the merch wasn’t weird as usual and that this was a short post doesn’t make it a deserving “record setter” in my eyes.
      enjoy this success nonetheless! Don’t mind my bad mood this afternoon!

    4. Pingback: Sunday Link-Off: Common Sense Revolution | The Lowdown

    Comments are closed.

  • Recent Posts

    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 73, 12/25/20 December 25, 2020
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 72, 9/4/20 September 4, 2020
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 71, 6/7/20 June 7, 2020
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 70, 5/10/20 May 10, 2020
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 69, 10/7/19 October 7, 2019
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 68, 8/24/19 August 24, 2019
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 67, 8/10/19 August 10, 2019
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 66, 7/27/19 July 27, 2019
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 65, 7/13/19 July 13, 2019
    • Wrestling On Air: Episode 64, 6/29/19 June 29, 2019

    Archives

    • December 2020
    • September 2020
    • June 2020
    • May 2020
    • October 2019
    • August 2019
    • July 2019
    • June 2019
    • May 2019
    • March 2019
    • February 2019
    • January 2019
    • December 2018
    • November 2018
    • October 2018
    • September 2018
    • August 2018
    • July 2018
    • June 2018
    • May 2018
    • April 2018
    • March 2018
    • February 2018
    • January 2018
    • December 2017
    • November 2017
    • October 2017
    • September 2017
    • August 2017
    • July 2017
    • June 2017
    • May 2017
    • April 2017
    • March 2017
    • February 2017
    • January 2017
    • December 2016
    • November 2016
    • October 2016
    • September 2016
    • August 2016
    • July 2016
    • June 2016
    • May 2016
    • April 2016
    • March 2016
    • February 2016
    • January 2016
    • December 2015
    • November 2015
    • October 2015
    • September 2015
    • August 2015
    • July 2015
    • June 2015
    • May 2015
    • April 2015
    • March 2015
    • February 2015
    • January 2015
    • December 2014
    • November 2014
    • October 2014
    • September 2014
    • August 2014
    • July 2014
    • June 2014
    • May 2014
    • April 2014
    • March 2014
    • February 2014
    • January 2014
    • December 2013
    • November 2013
    • October 2013
    • September 2013
    • August 2013
    • July 2013
    • June 2013
  • Wrestling On Air
  • Merch Table
  • Dirt Sheet History
  • Sexy Wrestler
  • ScoopZone
  • More Things
© 2013 by WrestlingOnEarth.com | Powered by RPX