Wrestling Fan Tattoos: Not Always the Best Idea

In his WWE documentary, CM Punk stated that he “feels sorry for anyone who doesn’t have tattoos”. Here are some reasons why this might be a silly thing to say, with evidence of some truly remarkable tattoos sourced from the skin of wrestling fans.

A lot of these were sourced from the Wrestling Tattoos Facebook page, which you should absolutely check out. Also, if you’ve got a hunger for more questionable tattoos, why not read our article about the Worst Back Tattoos in Wrestling?

IMPORTANT NOTE: Wrestling On Earth is a confirmed no-judge zone, so we’re not saying that any of these tattoos are terrible, nor are we questioning the sanity of their owners – you can make your own minds up about that.

Hulk Hogan

Yep, this is what we’re starting with. There’s a LOT going on here, but what’s most interesting is how the dimensions of the already beefy Hulkster are just CRAZY. Look at those arms! Is that intentional or was the artist just confused about exactly how many inches Hogan’s famous pythons are? Contrarily, his waist is so tiny that I can only assume he’s wearing a girdle.

If you were to get a tattoo of the Hulkster’s face on your butt cheek, what expression would you want him to have? Probably ‘coyly smug’, right? Right.

I HAVE ZERO SNARKY COMMENTS ABOUT THIS ONE, IT JUST FLAT-OUT RULES. Look at his cheeky little man-boobs! From now on, this is how I’ll always picture Hulk Hogan in my mind’s eye.

AJ Lee

Yikes. Honestly, if I didn’t know this was meant to be AJ, I’m not sure I could have guessed. She looks more like a long-lost relative of Julia Roberts with that terrifyingly toothy grin.

Weirdly, this one looks a lot more like AJ… even though she’s been zombified. I’m not sure what the guy’s trying to say by having a zombie version of a female wrestler inked into his flesh – is it a satirical comment on the nature of women’s wrestling in 2014? Or does he just have some very specific fetishes?

Also, what is it with dudes exclusively wanting tattoos of AJ in her old plaid outfit? What’s going on there, tattoo dudes?

Triple H

What’s most disturbing about this picture is that it’s impossible to tell exactly where mooning-cartoon-Triple-H has been inked into the guy’s body. Like, you can tell that some shaving was required, but that doesn’t really narrow it down. Is this a butt cheek on a butt cheek, making it the Inception of wrestling fan tattoos?

Satisfyingly, we get to see a reaction to this one from the main man himself, who seems appropriately taken aback:

BONUS FUN: If you needed any further confirmation that Twitter is really weird, that tweet from Triple H received the following reply within minutes of him posting it:

Stone Cold Steve Austin

Looking kind of puffy there, Steve – I think it’s time to be getting on that T+ and Alpha Brain, brother! Man, if only there was a podcast that could give you some kind of a special deal on those fine products.

Stephanie McMahon

It’s really hard not to see Vince in drag when you look at this for a while. I’m starting to realise that a tattoo isn’t always the most flattering medium for someone to be portrayed in.

Ultimate Warrior

Hooray, another adorable cartoon tattoo version of an ’80s wrestler featuring beautiful little moobs! The missing nipples are a little disturbing though. Was there a conversation between the tattoo artist and the tattoo recipient about whether to include them? Man, I hope so.

CM Punk

Once again, zero snark for this one, it’s completely great. When I first looked at it, I thought it was just a slightly off-model Punk… and then I saw the donuts… snd the other donuts… and the ‘DONUTS’ across his stomach. And I fell in love. I don’t even want to know the explanation behind this, it’s perfect just as it is.

Chris Benoit

NOPE.

EVERYONE

OKAY, so how many can you name? Here’s what I’ve got.

1. Kane, looking somewhat haughty.

2. Bret Hart, not really looking very much like Bret Hart.

3. Shawn Michaels’ beautifully rendered hair.

4. The Rock, looking very round in the face and somewhat confused.

5. Cheeky Stone Cold.

6. Squashed-face Triple H.

7. Square-jawed Brock Lesnar.

8. Sassy Jericho.

9. NOPE.

10. Troll-face Owen Hart.

11. THIS ONE TOOK ME FOREVER TO WORK OUT. Who could it be? Vince? Shane? Batista? Nope, nope and nope – I’m pretty sure it’s Hart Foundation-era Bulldog. What do you think?

UPDATE: Our main man Jordan has found definitive proof that #11 is, in fact… The Mountie. Yes, seriously – here’s the picture used as the source for the tattoo.

12. Skin condition Randy Orton.

13. Neglected Rey Mysterio.

AND THAT’S IT. Now, as far as I can tell, there’s room for another two on this mega-Mount Rushmore of wrestlers, though I’ve got no idea who’ll be the next ones to make the cut. God bless this guy for building his own permanent Hall of Fame right into his flesh though. That’s commitment, brother.