Many sites have a match of the week but ours is a little different. These matches are the ones that are fun to watch… in the non-traditional way.
This week, we continue to celebrate the “Shark Week” theme by celebrating our pro wrestling shark forefathers. The match of the week is Scott “Flash” Norton vs. The Shark BUT since it’s Shark Week, we will be adding a bonus match with a match featuring the modern day shark icon, Shark Boy. Site members @TimWelcomed and @typicalROHfan will give their (lack of) expertise on the shark greatness.
Earthquake? No. Avalanche? No. John Tenta? No. The true identity of this man should always be The Shark. This former Dungeon of Doom member left a very small mark on World Championship Wrestling.
The Shark vs. Scott Norton:
The match starts with one of wrestling’s greatest badasses, Scott Norton, coming to the ring but the fun doesn’t last long as The Shark jumps him. This is one disrespectful shark. You’d think if they were going to go as far as to paint what I suppose is their interpretation of a shark mouth on this guy’s face they’d at least put a fin on him somewhere to complete the look. Maybe I would just like my shark character to act like an anthropomorphic shark instead of a guy who dresses up like a shark to… umm… scare people?
The Shark is out of breathe before he can even get into the ring. The Shark gets his generic big man moves in here but in a “flash,” Scott Norton turns the tide on The Shark and puts us out of our misery.
Eric Bischoff and Steve “Mongo” McMichael, the commentating team from hell. Poor Bobby Heenan is trying his best to carry the commentary. WCW‘s fashion sense was way off on The Shark. Obviously meant to be intimidating, The Shark is rocking face paint and a headband fit for the wardrobe of a clown show at an aquarium. Although, I suppose that would be a fitting description of WCW.
The short match ends with Scott Norton picking up Shark for the slam and getting the win. There hasn’t been nearly enough Norton love on Wrestling on Earth yet but I promise that will change. After the match, a shove-fest between the two ensues. The Shark realizes he’s just there to collect a paycheck in the name of Hulk Hogan’s super friends and leaves the ring.
From being BFF with New Jack, to literally fish-slapping Gunner and Crimson, to suing the studio behind “The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl in 3-D” to numerous other accolades, Shark Boy proved there was a place for the shark in pro wrestling.
Shark Boy and D-Ray 3000 vs. Petey Williams and Alex Shelley:
First, I’d like us all to take a moment and thank the deities that D-Ray 3000 existed. D-Ray’s hair pick is a way more sinister and dangerous than Abyss‘ nail board, Sally… or whatever name they gave it. I can’t remember. Shark Boy’s offense is bite-based here just like I’d imagine a shark’s would be. Yeah, I’m looking at you, John Tenta. It’s hard not to point out that Petey Williams and Alex Shelley are in much better shape nowadays. Oh. My. God. I just remembered Abyss’ weapon’s name:
We get Jeremy Borash and Don West completely selling me on the Victory Road Interaction event. I’m looking for my time machine. God bless you, Don West. TNA has “six” appeal. Okay, I’m skipping these commercials. We get some Tree of Woe action in the name of Canada via Petey Williams. D-Ray eventually makes the hot tag to Shark Boy who comes in and dominates Petey Williams. This is just how Shark Boy rolls. Williams beats Shark Boy with a Rave Clash. This match was actually pretty fun to watch.
Petey Williams and Alex Shelley are awesome but I’m more excited to see some D-Ray and Shark Boy tag action. A fun tag team of oddballs will always get some interest from me. Fun fact: Our poll said 99 out of 100 folks would rather see Shark Boy and D-Ray 3000 as TNA tag champs than Gunner and James Storm. Yes, Gunner was one of the 100 people polled.
We see a commercial break with Jeremy Borash (plus 2005 frosted tips) and Don West (plus sexy red shirt) talking about something. I lost my concentration thinking about if I should invest in a red shirt. Now there’s a cheesy ad about TNA’s six sided ring (RIP) with the slogan “We have Six Appeal.” Get it? Like sex appeal? Oof. I do really miss the six sided ring, though.
Fun match and very easy to watch. It ends with Petey hitting a Styles Clash, as I’d assume this was in the time frame of his feud with AJ Styles. I’d definitely suggest watching it in addition to reading this. Especially, to tribute the greatest shark in wrestling history.
Who would win the ultimate shark showdown: Shark Boy or The Shark?
The Shark was just a man dressed up as a shark. Shark Boy is a highly evolved shark who took wrestling and my heart by storm. Shark Boy wins.
Shark Boy drop-kicked Christian Cage in a video game.
He has to win!