We’re doing a Slammys forecast. We’ve lost our minds.
Best John Cena U.S. Open Challenge
Of the choices, the only ones I remember fondly are Cesaro and Neville. I know Cesaro had the overall “better” match but Neville’s match opened my eyes to just how great he could be in WWE and earned him a new fan.
The Zayn match gets me down. It could have been an incredible surprise match but ended on such a sad note. I’m glad he’s back in the ring now! I think it comes down to the Neville match and the Cesaro match for me as I remember nothing from the other two. I’m leaning towards Cena vs Cesaro though. It had a great pace and was given a good bit of time. Cena unsurprisingly had amazing chemistry with Cesaro and it ended up being one of the best TV matches of the year.
I have no memory whatsoever of the Ziggler or Ambrose matches, but that’s true for almost all Ziggler and Ambrose matches in 2015. The Sami Zayn match was pretty good, considering the circumstances, but kind of a colossal bummer given the injury and what it could have been.
Anyway, as good as Neville was, my pick is the Cesaro match. It’s frustrating that it didn’t really go anywhere, but it still stands out as the pinnacle of the Cena US Title Open Challenge to me. Just two great lads having a sensational strong style match, right here in the US of A.
“Tell Me You Didn’t Just Say That” Moment of the Year
Almost all these were terrible! Seth Rollins saying Kane was just “there” is my pick because it sums up Kane’s role in WWE.
Pick: Seth Rollins says Kane was just “there” at Wrestlemania
This seems like the “Who Said The Most Childish Thing” category. The Justin Bieber thing was incredibly lame and made hardly any sense. “Johnny Idiot Face” was inconsequential and extremely childish but at least it fit with Rollins character somewhat. “Paige spoils Charlotte’s Diva’s Title Celebration” ….Yes, but what did she say that I want her to tell me she didn’t just say? Suplex City was a cool thing for Lesnar to say in the moment but quickly became annoying when everyone started riding it. I’m forced to go with Rollins aptly describing Kane’s role at Wrestlemania (and all the time, really).
Pick: Rollins says Kane was just “there” at Wrestlemania
What a mess of a category. “Suplex City” was fun and exciting for about 45 seconds, until everyone got too excited and ruined it. I don’t remember any of the others except for Rollins bantering Kane right off, so let’s go with that.
It’s really lame that they tried to make a “Justin Bieber” chant happen in 2015 and I’m annoyed to be reminded of that.
Pick: The Kane thing.
Celebrity Moment of the Year
These were all wonderful moments except the one with those Entourage scumbags. Kevin Owens threw a celebrity off the stage! It has to win. Between this, Stewart destroying John Cena and Arrow doing dives, 2015 was a pretty good year for celebrities in wrestling.
Pick: Kevin Owens powerbombs Machine Gun Kelly
Stephen Amell impressed during the build-up this year even though the actual match isn’t that memorable to me. The John Stewart thing was silly but absolutely ruined a great match for me. The Kevin Owens thing actually happened on a rare night where I wasn’t watching and hearing about it made me switch over to Raw.
Watching it back was great. It helped Owens’ character, it was hilarious because Machine Gun Kelly sucks big time, and anytime someone is thrown off the stage in any way I get excited for Joey. He really likes annoying people getting thrown off the stage and I can’t argue with that.
Pick: Kevin Owens powerbombs Machine Gun Kelly off the stage
I am on record as being the biggest fan of Jon Stewart ruining Summerslam but, thankfully, there’s another category where I can express my approval of him.
ANYWAY. Kevin Owens powerbombing that lame rapper guy off the stage was maybe the happiest I’ve ever been watching wrestling. Anyone getting tossed off the stage is an immediate contender for ‘moment of the year’, but for it to be a terrible, dumb celebrity and Big Kev to be the one doing the tossing… God, it was just amazing. Sensational stuff.
Pick: Kevin Owens tosses Machine Gun Kelly off the stage
WWE Tag Team of the Year
Pick: The New Day
Cesaro and Kidd were one of my favorite pairings in a long time. They actually had something there but there’s no way anyone can beat The New Day this year. They are just a force.
Pick: The New Day
It’s a bummer Cesaro and Kidd didn’t get to stay a team longer but man, I don’t think anyone could rival New Day this year.
Pick: The New Day
Best Original WWE Network Show
Finally! A tough one. I have to go with Table For 3. Aside from Dean Ambrose being a goof, this show spotlights entertaining conversations and makes you relate to the wrestlers more. While I love most of the other shows and content on the Network, Table For 3 is my favorite thing to come from it. We all know the fix is in for the Steve Austin Podcast or Breaking Ground.
Pick: Table For 3
Table for 3 is good when it has the right people on it but only two or three episodes really stick out to me so far. HOWEVER…
Every episode of Swerved stood out as one of the greatest experiences in the WWE Universe. I figure WWE Network subscriptions went through the roof during this period. I’ve come to terms with it being gone for good but I will never forget the time we had together, Swerved. We are all better for knowing you and your ill-advised madness. I hope everyone joins in and supports Swerved tonight.
I got kind of bored of Table for 3! A couple of them are terrific (specifically Daniel Bryan bringing banter of the highest possible standard to Ryback), but others are either the same old stories or just don’t quite click for whatever reason. Stone Cold podcasts have become dull as dishwater. Breaking Ground has its moments, but it can be pretty boring too.
Swerved though… Swerved will always hold a special place in my heart. It’s such a dumb show and it’s pretty mean-spirited a lot of the time, but it was weirdly the most revealing of all the Network shows. Like, the true personalities of guys really shone through. Poor Kofi, Jesus. They almost blinded him but he kept his cool. Summer Rae, what a sweetheart. Paige being a mad old bastard. I’m glad it’s gone, for the sanity of the wrestlers, but I’m even more glad we had it while we did. RIP Swerved. I love you.
Surprise Return of the Year
These were all trash except for Sting because he was hiding in a box for 20 minutes and his facepaint started to melt. I sadly missed this moment live but very proud of Brooklyn for losing their minds for Sting hiding in a giant box. lol at Kane being nominated.
My heart wants to go with Sting here. It was absurd and I want Sting to win a Slammy. Unfortunately only one of these felt like an actual surprise and it was Del Rio returning. It may have gone extremely bad as soon as he started to wrestle but at least it was cool when his music hit.
Pick: Del Rio answers Cena’s US Open Challenge
Del Rio was kind of a cool deal when it happened! They managed to defuse it in almost record time, but it felt worthwhile on the night. Also, it’s nice to have Del Rio coming back as concrete evidence that The Fed is NOT racist, not even a bit.
Pick: Del Rio returns.
Double-Cross of the Year
Jon Stewart deserves this win because I don’t remember any of the other choices. I wasn’t sure what to feel about it but after seeing it play before every Nets game at beautiful Barclays Center, I’m honored to have witnessed such a legendary moment in our sport and my venue.
Pick: Jon Stewart fucks up John Cena
Damien Mizdow eliminating The Miz at Wrestlemania should have been a huge breaking-out point for Sandow. It should have happened sooner but the fans loved Mizdow and that was a much wanted turn. They failed to do anything with it but I was excited when it finally happened as I had a little hope for him.
Pick: Damien Mizdow eliminates The Miz
EASILY Jon Stewart. I laughed so much when I saw it live, it was so good, pure pro wrestling. I can’t even imagine how it came about or why it was decided as the best way to finish that match, but I’m so happy it worked out like it did.
Pick: Jon Stewart
Rivalry of the Year
Yikes. No Kevin Owens vs. John Cena? None of these rivalries blew me away but I’ll go with Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker. Everything else here resulted in forgettable storylines but ‘Taker vs. Lesnar will likely be remembered as ‘Taker’s second to last feud. Plus Undertaker was known as the old man who kicked people in the balls for a good month.
Pick: Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar
These choices are super bad. Uh, I guess I’ll go with Rollins vs Orton? They had that cool spot at Wrestlemania…? Yeah, that’s it. I didn’t like any of these feuds.
Pick: Orton vs Rollins
I actively hated most of these feuds! Let’s go with Cena and Rusev, at least that had a tank and some flags. I was about to say how the Lesnar/Rollins feud was actually pretty cool, for what it was, but then I double-checked the category and saw it was Orton/Rollins. WHO CARES, NOT ME.
Pick: Cena vs. Rusev
WWE Diva of the Year
This was the most difficult choice for me. Paige and Charlotte are awful. I think the choice has to be Nikki Bella due to main roster presence but I don’t care. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley was the most incredible wrestling match I’ve ever witnessed live and I will be biased! Sasha Banks all day.
Pick: Sasha Banks
If we have to go with main roster here it’s Nikki Bella. It’s not that I think she’s all that great but she carries herself well and was definitely the most prominent this year.
Pick: Nikki Bella
“Fearless” Nicole’s got this (assuming they won’t be counting NXT women’s matches towards all this). She’s carried a reality show AND a division on her back for most of 2015, a true worker.
Pick: Nikki Bella
WWE Superstar of the Year
I view the “WWE Superstar of the Year” differently than a traditional “Wrestler of the Year” award. I think about my top memories of the year. My favorite match: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins at Royal Rumble. My favorite moment: Seth Rollins cashing in at Wrestlemania. My favorite crowd atmosphere: Brooklyn for John Cena vs. Seth Rollins. My three most memorable moments of the year all featured Seth Rollins as the main player. While he was unfortunately sentenced to WWE purgatory in feuds with Kane and Dean Ambrose, it was his year until the injury.
This sums up WWE 2015 for me:
I got the champ.
Pick: Seth Rollins
I always want to go with who entertained me the most with this one. Seth Rollins is up there. He was in a couple of my favorite WWE matches over the year and his character got a good laugh out of me a few times which hardly ever happens in WWE. Cena had amazing matches almost every week with the US Open Invitational and was the main reason I tuned in for a while. I debated with myself over picking him or this next guy for a long time before typing this out. Cena truly had a great year.
Then there is Kevin Owens who really sticks out to me. His character is something somewhat different on the WWE scene. It has a depth to it. He’s an asshole with a sense of humor. A bad guy with some wit is usually hard to find in WWE. He’s a “prize fighter” who does what he thinks he needs to do to provide for his family. Within all of that his ego shows. He’s prideful. There’s not many characters in WWE that are three-dimensional like that. Does WWE use that to its full potential? No, of course not but Owens does what he can to show off these traits in interviews, matches, and the overall way he carries himself. That is a character I can connect with in some form because he seems human. He had a great main roster debut feud with Cena. He has top-level mic skills. He seems to really enjoy doing what he does. I can not help but be with Kevin Owens here.
Pick: Kevin Owens
Alright, who are the realistic contenders then? The US Title Open Invitation Challenge helped solidify Cena as a super versatile wrestler who could have fun, different matches with a whole range of opponents, but we kind of already knew that, right? Rollins had amazing highs with his Cena and Lesnar matches, but the rest of his year was spent trudging around in feuds with the likes of Ambrose and Kane, which is especially frustrating now he’s injured. Who else is there, Roman Reigns? He’s much better than he was, yes, but he’s still not a guy I’m invested in at all.
Anyway, forgot all those fucks, my pick is Kevin Owens. Is this a personal pick? SURE, I guess. However, I really do think there’s a very solid case for him – along with New Day, he’s one of the few reasons I’ve kept watching Raw, thanks to his in-ring banter being at an absolutely sensational level. He’s also resulted in me giving Smackdown a chance, given that’s the show where he seems to get most mic time and opportunity to shine on commentary. In terms of feuds, the Cena matches were great, the ongoing war with Sami Zayn was perfectly handled and he even made a rivalry with Alex Riley must-see television, for fuck’s sake. ALEX FUCKING RILEY. WHAT ON EARTH. Give it to him for this moment alone:
Actually, for this moment too, FUCK YOUR FLOWERS:
Pick: Kevin Owens