WCW: The Comic Book was published in the early 90s by Marvel Comics. Nobody in wrestling or comics paid it much attention, and after 12 issues, it was cancelled and lost to the ages. Until now.
On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, @tomblackett will post a new page of the WCW comic with his comments and we’ll read through it together. We’ll be there for each other, through the good (Vader! The Steiners! Sting! Cactus Jack!) and the (Johnny B.) Badd.
WCW: The Comic (Issue Two, Page 6)
WCW: The Comic is probably the property of Marvel Comics / WWE, though I’m not entirely sure. This website makes no claims to own it; all panels and images are posted in the spirit of fair use and are the property of their respective owners and creators.
Tom: MAIN EVENT TIME! Lex Luger makes his entrance to a torrential downpour of garbage, but The Z-Man, Tom Zenk, Ron Simmons and Sting look like an even bigger bunch of losers, having to all come out at the same time:
Sting doesn’t help matters by talking like a Ninja Turtle on his way to the ring. “Little Stinger-dude”? Come on, man, not even kids will tolerate being pandered to like that.
Back at the announce table, and… look, I get that wrestling paints in broad strokes a lot of the time. That’s cool, I can deal with guys being a little one-dimensional. However, when listing all the character attributes of The Computerized Announcer of the ’90s, Terrence Taylor, this is all I’ve got:
1) He’s a bit of a dick.
2) He owns a computer.
AND THAT’S NOT ENOUGH, at least not when he’s co-narrating every single page and you get stuck having to read stuff like this:
It’s kind of amazing (in an extremely terrible way), but I really do miss Paul E. Dangerously on commentary.
The match begins, and my personal favourite, The Z-Man, doesn’t fare too well:
Oh Z-Man, you poor idiot. When someone says ‘ARE YOU NUTS?’ in response to you asking to have a good, clean match, you’ve got no right to expect anything less than a belt shot to the back of the head.
But what happens next? You’d assume that Lex would be disqualified and the match would be over… or at least you would if this wasn’t WCW: The Comic. Find out on Friday to see if Tom Zenk’s fortune changes for the better (SPOILERS: they definitely don’t).