• The Blast Zone

    The Blast Zone: Straight To The Point

    Our controversial opinion sharer Nightlife has returned with The Blast Zone! Don’t expect any punches to be pulled as he fearlessly puts the world of wrestling on BLAST!

    Hey guys it’s me, Nightlife (@AnimeKing420). Welcome back to another fantastic, HARD-HITTING edition of THE BLAST ZONE!!! However, I must start this edition with some UNFORTUNATE NEWS!!! 

    It would appear that SOME PEOPLE (I’M NOT NAMING NAMES, JOEY) have a GRUDGE against THE BLAST ZONE!!! And not JUST Paul “Hunter” Levesque, or Vincent Kennedy McMahon Jr. I’m talking about CERTAIN EDITORS OF A CERTAIN WEBSITE THIS ARTICLE IS POSTED ON!!! Certain “Jack-Asses” think they can just CRITIQUE my articles on “grammatical” grounds. I AM AN ENGLISH MAJOR!!! I KNOW HOW TO FUCKING WRITE!!!!! FUCK OFF, TROLLS!!!

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    With that out of the way, it’s time to get right into it, right into another sizzling, scintillating episode of THE BLAST ZONE. Continue reading

    The Blast Zone: Black Thursday Special

    Our controversial opinion sharer Nightlife has returned with The Blast Zone! Don’t expect any punches to be pulled as he fearlessly puts the world of wrestling on BLAST!

    Hey guys it’s me, Nightlife (@AnimeKing420), and I’m back. It’s been a while, and I was considering hanging up my vintage ECW shirt that I bought off of wweshop.com in 2008, which I wear every time I write up one of these rants. The anger just wasn’t there as it used to be.

    But then, WWE (who I will from henceforth REFUSE to use their “proper” name) did the unthinkable:

    THEY PISSED ME OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    What did New York do THIS time, you ask??? If you weren’t a STUPID MARK with your HEAD buried in the Internet sand, you would KNOW the reason:

    THEY FIRED JTG!!!

    JTG

    For those of you who aren’t familiar with JTG, he is the central figure in 90% of wrestling memes. Want a quick, easy laugh? Use the tried-and-true image macro of JTG with “still employed” superimposed over the bottom of the image. Guaranteed upvotes on Reddit and mod favor on 420chan’s wrestling board.

    That’s right, true believers. The ‘E has finally done it: they’ve WAGED WAR on the TRUE fans!

    BLAST-O-METER RATING: 5

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    The Blast Zone: The Debut

    Here at Wrestling On Earth, we welcome original content from our readers. Controversial opinion sharer NightlifePlus decided to take us up our offer and debut BlastZone! Each topic is met with a vicious rant, all followed by the Blast O Meter.

    What’s up guys it’s Nightlife (@AnimeKing420) here. I just have one thing to say:

    I am STEAMING MAD!!!

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    That’s right folks, I am PISSED OFF about wrestling! CERTAIN COMPANIES (gee I wonder which companies they could be!!!!!) are doing wrestling COMPLETELY THE WRONG WAY!!! What’s the right way, you ask? My way, duh. Like, it’s super fucking obvious that I know what’s best for wrestling. Still not convinced? Then you aren’t worth my time.

    I have previously had no outlet for my anger. Then I found out that this website accepts articles written by anybody with no editorial oversight, and thus my feature article (the BEST ON THE SITE!!!) is born. Welcome to THE BLAST ZONE.

    The rules of THE BLAST ZONE: nothing is off-limits. That’s right, marks. None of your beloved SHITTY “wrestling” (come on idiots we all know it’s “Sports Entertainment” (ugh!!!)) companies are safe.

    So, who am I putting ON BLAST this week? None other than…

    wwe

    WWE!!!!!

    Oh, what’s that? You stupid MARKS (you CLAIM to be “smart” but you watch WWE so you clearly AREN’T!!!) are now quaking in forty dollar Randy Orton t-shirts??? Scared yet??? It’s OK to be scared. I’m only about to tear the WORST company in “Sports Entertainment” a new asshole and there’s not a damn thing you pathetic Cena fanboys (because that’s ALL WWE fans REALLY ARE) can do about it.

    Continue reading