• ScoopZone Elite

    ScoopZone Elite: February 15, 2016

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

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    News for the Week of February 15, 2016

    WWE

    • Vince McMahon is donating all money Titus O’Neil will lose in his suspension to Donald Trump‘s campaign.

     

    • Neil deGrasse Tyson is working on a twenty page paper on why Stardust is not realistic because an alien would dominate pro wrestling.

     

    • The Big Show has some heat backstage after cutting a face promo on the second Tuesday of February. It is clearly stated in his contract that he is a heel on the first Friday, second Tuesday, and entire last week of every month.

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    NXT

    • Eric Bischoff, Vince Russo and Jim Cornette all see potential in Alex Riley.

     

    • A reality show has been pitched for the WWE Network featuring the ghosts of Bill DeMott and Bull Dempsey haunting The Performance Center.

     

    • The most recent NXT roster cuts were to free up money for Baron Corbin to finally have a motorcycle to drive during his entrance.


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    Other

    • A group of fans are starting an online movement to boycott all future films starring The Rock because his Instagram picture wearing a Lucha Underground shirt “might be a spoiler.”

     

    • There have been claims that TNA stole various high school student’s band names by naming a stable “The Decay.”

     

    • Lance Storm rips the tag off every pair of $700 jeans that Chris Jericho purchases before he can try them on.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: February 1, 2016

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

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    News for The Week of February 1, 2016

    WWE

    • Byron Saxton may be missing a few weeks of shows for scheduled maintenance. This is a completely normal process for all androids.

     

    • The roster being depleted with injuries has led to talks of Vince McMahon returning to in-ring action against The Undertaker in the main event of Wrestlemania 32.

     

    • Alicia Fox asking to legally change her name to Alicia Bella will be a huge part of the next season of Total Divas.

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    NXT

    • Austin Aries is already trying to form a relationship with Triple H by setting his ringtone to Motorhead and loudly talking about Joe DeFranco‘s workouts any time Triple H is in the same room as him.

     

    • Corey Graves isn’t allowed to be around Bayley’s inflatable tube men because he always tries drawing tattoos on them.

     

    • Sami Zayn has become very unpopular in the locker room by trying to recruit members of NXT to start a real musical band.


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    Other

    • Lucha Underground will begin filming Season 5 next week.

     

    • Wrestling fans across the globe are worried that Lucha Underground will not get a sixth season and a movie.

     

    • Lance Storm has fed fake information about Chris Jericho and Taz to each of them in successful attempts of elaborately starting a podcast war for his own amusement.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: January 25, 2016

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for The Week of January 25, 2016

    WWE

    • Vince McMahon has Kane and The Big Show giving “The Black Sheep” Braug Strawbin private lessons on how to make any show a very specific type of boring.

     

    • With John Cena, The Undertaker and soon-to-be Brock Lesnar on his resume, WWE is meticulously planning a reverse streak for Bray Wyatt where he goes 0-20 at Wrestlemania.

     

    • Dolph Ziggler announced that his upcoming comedy show at The Funny Shack has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances. Close friends speculate that The Funny Shack never existed in the first place.

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    NXT

    • Austin Aries is publicly telling friends that he plans to support Bernie Sanders in the Presidential election but he is privately going to vote for Donald Trump.

     

    • Alex Riley is publicly supporting Donald Trump in the Presidential election but he is privately not going to vote and instead sit in a dark room.

     

    • Baron Corbin secretly watches Ring of Honor television every week and pre-orders all PWG DVDs.


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    Other

    • TNA has offered AJ Lee an unprecedented seven-figure contract so their new AJ merch doesn’t go to waste.

     

    • Jim Ross is under investigation after three bottles of his BBQ sauce were found to be filled with nothing but whiskey.

     

    • Lance Storm uses his reputation to get free ProWrestlingTees shirts of other wrestlers but sells them on the black market at half price.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: January 21, 2016

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for the Week of January 21, 2016

    WWE

    • WWE has offered a huge contract to AJ Styles. It’s just a normal contract but it comes with the promise of never making him get blonde highlights put in his hair.

     

    • Dean Ambrose practices smirking into a mirror for an hour before every show.

     

    • Dewey Foley was responsible for Baron Corbin humiliating Frank the Clown.

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    More WWE

    • Chris Jericho has been pitched to star in the WWE Studios film “15 Going On 50.”

     

    • Vince McMahon not being strong enough to open the Royal Rumble tumbler balls was a rib on his perception of Tyler Breeze.

     

    • Finn Balor continues to tease The Bullet Club coming to WWE. This time he spray-painted “Bullet Club might be coming to WWE but we’re probably just going to change the name to Balor Club for legal reasons. It’s pretty obvious already but I’m giving you all a heads up anyway” on the back of one of his opponents after a match. Backstage Triple H and the NXT staff praised his ability to paint so many words on such a small space and have it be legible.


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    Other

    • Austin Aries still shows up to TNA tapings to chastise anyone eating meat at catering.

     

    • Mike Bennett is working on a new catchphrase now that he has realized saying “you witnessed a miracle” after he defeats someone makes him look bad.

     

    • Lance Storm throws snowballs at city buses in his spare time.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: January 11, 2016

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for The Week of January 11, 2016

    WWE

    • Dads across the world turned Raw off after Chris Jericho said “Rooty Tooty Booty.” The United Dadssociation then held an emergency meeting to discuss dismissing Jericho as a celebrity spokesperson. More on this as it develops.

     

    • The booking team is struggling to find a predictable and unlikable choice worthy enough to win the 2016 Royal Rumble.

     

    • Dean Ambrose has fallen into character a little too much over the post few months. He has started calling his car “The Ambrose Asylum” and throws drinks on anyone who even mildly irritates him backstage.

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    More WWE

    • Vince McMahon thinks more Vince McMahon will help Wrestlemania 32 break the all-time WWE attendance record.

     

    • Curtis Axel is considering calling in sick with “the flu” at Royal Rumble so he can continue to get ironic tweets and Wreddit posts about not being eliminated last year.

     

    • WWE is wanting to split The Dudley Boyz so that Bubba Ray can start acting like his Bully Ray persona. D-Von will only agree to the split if WWE allows him to start an angle using his two sons.


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    Other

    • Dave Meltzer‘s least favorite Harry Potter character is Neville Longbottom.

     

    • Disney has bought the rights to the Bullet Club name.

     

    • Lance Storm missed the January 4 Dome Show because he thought it was going to be on January 5th.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: December 28, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for The Week of December 28, 2015

    WWE

    • WWE has banned New Day Unicorn Horns backstage after Ryback stuffed one down his pants to impress someone and injured himself.

     

    • Big Show intentionally planned to take off most of December so he wouldn’t be forced to wear a diaper for New Year’s Eve promos.

     

    • As of right now the plan is to have Triple H (Paul Levesque) return and win The Royal Rumble. Keep in mind that plans change but the last thing I heard was that this was like, you know, the plan for The Royal Rumble. If this happens, which as of the last time I talked to anyone there it was going to, Triple H will face the champion at WrestleMania 32 in Dallas in a match for that championship belt.

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    More WWE

    • Vince McMahon is ready to call Mojo Rawley up to the main roster but he isn’t sure about “that tag team partner of his.”

     

    • Ric Flair has called WWE offices claiming he got lost multiple times this month when realizing he was the only wrestler in the bar after shows.

     

    • Hulk Hogan is planning to attend the WWE Hall of Fame by wearing his Mr. America mask.


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    Other

    • Jim Ross thinks TNA podcast guests are transitioning the conversation to soda when talking about their new television network.

     

    • Taz tried watching Star Wars: The Phantom Menace for the first time over the weekend but turned it off after they kept calling them “pod racers” and not “radio racers.”

     

    • Lance Storm is ignoring all “Happy New Year” messages because he doesn’t believe in the concept of years.

    ScoopZone Elite: December 14, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for The Week of December 14, 2015

    WWE

    • Ryback has had a wire and pulley system installed at his home gym so he can practice his high-risk maneuvers safely.

     

    • WWE is making private Slammys to award Roman Reigns as “Most Handsome” and “Best Grimace.”

     

    • Shawn Michaels stated that Dolph Ziggler needs to find his own identity. Ziggler took the words to heart and is now trying to draw his own emojis.

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    More WWE

    • Sheamus is considering saying “no” to WWE officials for the first time in his career when being pressured to wear his “Sheamus 5:15” shirts at Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles press tours.

     

    • The Miz is looking to do a Halloween themed movie next year as he is worried he is starting to be typecast as a Christmas movie actor.

     

    • Ric Flair plans to spill vodka on Dewey Foley‘s paperwork as revenge for Mick Foley having an opinion about Raw.


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    Other

    • Hulk Hogan is trying to get a job in Lucha Underground as the American soldier shown in the trailer.

     

    • Leading scientists say that there is a 98% chance that Chris Jericho will get a tattoo on his face within the next two years.

     

    • Lance Storm is pitching a dream match at Wrestlemania between the League of Nations and the Un-Americans.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: December 7, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for the Week of December 7, 2015

    WWE

    • WWE wanted to get the last ever ECW champion to join up with The Dudley Boys but Ezekiel Jackson declined when he realized his airplane ticket wasnt for an aisle seat.

     

    • Charlotte believes she can become this generation’s version of The Rock after mishearing fans saying she has the charisma of a rock.

     

    • Dolph Ziggler had a scary moment at the gym when the tears he cried while listening to “Home Sweet Home” by Motley Crue created a puddle underneath him causing him to take a nasty spill.

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    TNA

    • To get ahead of the competition, TNA has offered Noelle Foley a six-figure contract to lead the creative team.

     

    • Mike Tenay still doesn’t know what the fuck is going on.

     

    • It has been so long since TNA filmed a show that Mr. Anderson has started talking into his shower head like a microphone to feel productive.


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    Other

    • ROH is selling a new coloring book. Delirious is only allowing sales if you promise to stay in the lines.

     

    • Colt Cabana is already planning a fourth Wrestling Road Diaries. This one will be a supercut of him standing at various gas pumps taken from abandoned footage of the last three documentaries.

     

    • Lance Storm‘s children strongly regret informing him what emojis are.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: November 23, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for the Week of November 23, 2015

    WWE

    • With John Cena away hosting a reality show Vince McMahon feels like Roman Reigns needs to host a show as well. Unfortunately no networks will get behind the idea so they are looking to bring back Legends’ House with Reigns as the host.

     

    • The Miz vanity searches Dolph Ziggler on social media and prints out all negative comments to show him as revenge for past internet reputations.

     

    • We have confirmed with our inside source that Big E was not really injured during his match at Survivor Series.

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    More WWE

    • NXT fans at Full Sail plan to respond to Mick Foley‘s criticisms by chanting “Sorry, Foley”, “We disagree” and “We’re a good crowd” during each match on the next television taping.

     

    • The most prestigious mathematicians in the world are still hard at work trying to figure out why Charlotte’s finishing move is called “The Figure Eight.”

     

    • Bubba Ray Dudley continues to try talking creative into letting him have a singles run despite D-Von’s constant worry that they’ll make him go back to being a reverend.


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    Other

    • Hulk Hogan is trying to market a new condiment brand called “Hulkamania” where he mixes ketchup and mustard together.

     

    • Terry Funk is set to appear in Season 2 of Lucha Underground as Son of Havoc‘s father Havoc.

     

    • Lance Storm celebrates Canadian Thanksgiving on the date of American Thanksgiving and celebrates American Thanksgiving on the date of Canadian Thanksgiving to stick it to the man.

     

    ScoopZone Elite: November 9, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

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    News for the Week of November 9, 2015

    WWE

    • Vince McMahon is blaming all of his roster problems on the Millennials.

     

    • Wrestling fans are still trying to decide whether they’re hoping to be disappointed in Finn Balor not being in the WWE Championship tournament or not being a partner of Undertaker and Kane.

     

    • WWE used all of their yearly special effects budget on animating the low-resolution lightning bolts for Bray Wyatt. This has forced them to cancel the CGI dancing zombies they had planned for Kane’s Wrestlemania 32 entrance.

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    TNA

    • TNA’s next shows are actually in Indiana. Talent is very upset after preparing for a 15 hour flight and expecting a fascinating life experience.

     

    • Austin Aries is disgruntled about something.

     

    • TNA have been working to figure out a new order to air the matches from the World Championship Series for a second World Championship Series without it being noticeable that they are recycling the same content.


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    Other

    • New Japan is considering having a two-ring setup for their big shows so everyone in the IWGP Jr. Heavyweight Tag Team Championship matches has a place to stand.

     

    • Taz is looking to get a daytime talk show so people will for sure not call what he does a podcast.

     

    • Lance Storm doesn’t get the appeal of koalas or red pandas.