• Monthly Archives: March 2015

    This Or That (3/17/2015)

    Everybody loves binary decisions, especially wrestling fans! In This Or That, we’ve forced ourselves to choose between two options that relate to wrestling.

    Over four questions, @TimWelcomed, @JoeySplashwater and @TomBlargh will have to choose one of two options and give their reasoning on each of their choices. You can then vote on which one you’d choose, giving you the false impression that you’re somehow involved and we care about your opinion chance to join the conversation!

    Before we start, here’s last week‘s results:

    Will Wrestlemania 31 be the worst Wrestlemania of the last 15 years?

    Yes – 54%, No – 46%

    Better version of Paul Heyman?

    Current day Paul Heyman – 80%, Paul E. Dangerously – 20%

    Who do you side with in their podcast war?

    Chris Jericho – 67%, Taz – 33%

    Better junk food snack?

    Potato chips – 68%, Cookies – 32%

    This week, there’s a British invasion theme submitted by @AnimeKing420.

    Better wrestler: Adrian Neville or Bad News Barrett?

    barrett-neville

    Tim:

    I think Adrian Neville has more potential overall but as of right now, Bad News Barrett has the whole package. He’s a good talker and pretty good in the ring. I really like the guy. Hopefully one day WWE will use him to his full potential.

    Bad News Barrett

    Joey:

    Adrian Neville has special talents that very few can imagine but Bad News Barrett is the better overall wrestler. It took me a while to see it but Barrett is very good and if he ever gets away from the hell that is the Intercontinental title picture, he may have a chance at being elevated higher on the card. Love what Neville does in NXT but it’s hard to see him adapting to a broader product without making some changes and I’m not sure he can.

    Bad News Barrett

    Tom:

    First of all, I’d like to thank Nightlife for these extremely respectful questions. As the site’s resident British person, I’m delighted to share my informed opinion on these hot-button issues.

    Anyway, Barrett. I like Barrett, man. I like him a whole bunch. He deserves better than he’s had so far and I hope he gets a chance to be in a spotlight position this year. However, I’ve really gotten into Adrian Neville over the past year or so; his feud with Sami Zayn showcased that he’s able to play more than just the flippy nice guy and I think he’s improved a huge amount in terms of putting together a great match.

    ALSO, Neville is from Newcastle so his accent’s more of a laugh than Barrett’s Lancashire drawl. It reminds me of Byker Grove, and that is NEVER a bad thing.

    Adrian Neville

    Better wrestler?

    • Adrian Neville (68%, 41 Votes)
    • Bad News Barrett (32%, 19 Votes)

    Total Voters: 60

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    ScoopZone Elite: March 16, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for The Week of March 16, 2015

    WWE

    • Vince McMahon always pitches angles involving Jim Ross getting beat up or made fun of until someone reminds him that he is still not back with the company.

     

    • Seth Rollins threatened to tweet out more nude photos of WWE employees if Jimmy Jacobs wasn’t hired.

     

    • There is a clause in every contract for popular indie wrestlers who sign with WWE that says they must pose for selfies with Triple H at least twice a month.

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    TalkIsJerichNo

    TNA

    • TJ Perkins/Manik is protesting Women’s History Month by using the women’s restroom all month.

     

    • Matt Hardy claims that he and his brother will soon make Impact Wrestling a “weekly can’t miss product.” Word from backstage is that Jeff Hardy has been recording voice-overs for his thoughts and Matt Hardy’s hair has been braided.

     

    •  Disgruntled TNA office employees put orange peels in Taz‘s mailbox to piss him off.


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    Other

    • PWG is the first wrestling promotion to have a 4 star average match rating by Dave Meltzer.

     

    • After years of pressure Tony Schiavone is finally working on creating his own brand of BBQ sauce.

     

    • Lance Storm can only be contacted via AIM chat.

     

     

    Around The Wrestling World In 7 Days

    Every weekend, Joey will give a glimpse of the things that have entered his mind.

    Hi. I have a lot of thoughts about wrestling. I decided to start a concept where I talk about what’s on my mind every weekend. I hope it’s enjoyable.

    Follow me on Twitter and let me know if you want me to hit on any wrestling topics next week: @JoeySplashwater

    WWE Universe

    rollins

    Wrestlemania

    I haven’t been this less excited for a Wrestlemania since Wrestlemania 11 back when I didn’t realize Wrestlemania was a special thing. Every year going forward, there’s been at least one match or storyline that has captivated me going into the big show. Sometimes they were home runs (The Rock vs. Hollywood Hogan), sometimes they were strike outs (Randy Orton vs. Triple H), but they always made me feel something special was happening. None of that is here. Sting’s debut WWE match is my selling point but becomes less appealing every time you watch a WWE segment on Sting. The Ultimate X Ladder Match exhibition and burial of Daniel Bryan is probably most depressing.

    Seth Rollins

    Seth Rollins has lost so much momentum since his breakout performance at the Royal Rumble. The best heel in years, Rollins had become the top overall performer in WWE for a few months but that’s no more as his long, drawn out angle with Randy Orton has been a kiss of death. The slow burn build to an “RKO out of nowhere” payoff at Wrestlemania 31 may be enough to kill his chances of being in a good position to leave Wrestlemania week as WWE champion.

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    Sexy Wrestler of The Week

    A new Sexy Wrestler of The Week is ready to be named.

    Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I’m here again to reveal The Sexy Wrestler of The Week as usual. I started a new, better paying job this week since I had to kick my roommate out a few weeks ago and it made it hard to count all of the votes by myself. However, I did it for you. This is the single most important award in the business and probably will be for years to come. I can’t just half-ass this or the wrestling world would lose something extremely special. I make this possible. I’m Willy Wonker and this is my cupcake factory. All of my fellow literature-maniacs will get that one. 😉

    I started working at a paper bag manufacturer. Yeah, paper may be a dying cause but your fancy digital world can’t quite contain physical products yet so… looks like the joke is on you. Good luck carrying your flour using nothing but your Facebook or your Photoshop. Anyway, let me tell you more about me and my new job since you read this every week and care so much about me as a person. As a beginner I am in charge of cutting up huge rolls of faulty or misprinted paper. If the big boys in the production line mess up their ink mix for Big Granny’s Wheat Crumbs, your boy here makes sure that embarrassing roll of paper is destroyed. I then must clean out the ink buckets.

    I can’t wear nice clothes to this job! By the end of the night I am covered in a plethora of colors and let me tell you right now, it is a real treat. I feel like a hard-working rainbow. Sometimes I get to have a ten minute bathroom break but it always smells like an ashtray in there for some reason. When the boss isn’t roaming the floor in his suit, tie, and hair net I get to sneak over to my friend that works with the binding machine. If you’re lucky you can stick your finger in there without it getting cut off but it’s very rare. I then come home to count votes for you lovely people.

    SWOTWBrock

    The Sexy Wrestler of The Week is the WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Brock Lesnar. He may not be around much but you all seem to love him. Maybe it is the sword tat. Maybe it is his business savvy nature. Maybe this is a way to state that you want him to stick around and not head off to fight with the modern-day gladiators of MMA. Either way, he won and that’s just how it was supposed to be.

     

    Speaking of Brock Lesnar, I will now share with you a cute little story from when I was a young boy.

    PokeLesnar

    I was a big fan of collecting Pokemon cards in late ’98 and ’99. I was ten years old when I got my first pack. I remember coming out of Wal-Mart with the shiny gold pack in my bag. I get into my family’s burning hot Jeep Cherokee. I couldn’t even touch my seatbelt without whimpering in pain at it burning my skin but I knew I had to. I had to get it done because I was taught that safety was the only way to keep me from dying. The faster I got it buckled, the faster I could rip into this pack of Pokemon cards. As I did, my eyes intently glimmering with love at every single one, even the commons with the mediocre artwork but the last card was truly something special. A holographic Machamp card shimmering.

    I remember my mom having to pull over from it blinding her. When she realized what it was she began weeping proudly. My dad reached up from the backseat and our family embraced in the most emotional group hug you could ever imagine. It was a place where tears flowed freely. Free of judgement and ridicule. Just a family showing their appreciation for the little things in life and their truly blessed son inside a hot Jeep Cherokee amongst the fumes of warm leather and plastic. Yeah, I eventually got a holographic Charizard card as well but it meant nothing to me emotionally when compared to this Machamp card. It changed my world.

    I took it to school to show all of my pals. Their was some intense jealousy. I could see that immediately but that wasn’t going to stop me from showing everyone I knew a few times. I was invincible, after all. By the end of the day I had a black eye and my card was ripped in to pieces by my so-called best friend, Burt Hamm. I would then return home where one of the most tragic moments in my life would occur. With the loss of this card I had greatly shamed my family. My sisters threw packs of pudding at me. My mom cursed at me for a full 24 hours. My dad wouldn’t roll down the back window of the Jeep to even talk to me.

    I finally got some sleep but awoke to my bags being packed. My mom was sending me to live in a cabin atop a mountain in Nebraska. She claimed I would learn to fend for myself, thus gaining honor and a sense of self-worth. She handed me my grandpa’s legendary Lantern of The Fates that he found while fighting in The Great War. It was made out of limestone and glowed with a greenish hue. I took it and was set on my way. I loved in this cabin for years with nothing but a sack of jerky and a TV. This is where I met the man who would give me the strength to move on. I was watching Raw in 2002 when Brock Lesnar debuted. His strength, courage, and primal instincts propelled me to make a huge garden. I made so many eggplants that I eventually received a letter from my mom. “It’s time to come home.”

    The next day a helicopter landed and would take me home. It was 2003 by then and I was older than I was in ’99. We landed on the roof of my house. When they dropped the ladder to climb down I said “no, thanks” and performed the greatest somersault in the history of the world. When I landed on my feet my milk and sisters were there to welcome me home and then something amazing happened.

    For the first time, my father opened up the backdoor of the Jeep and got out. He then walked over and hugged me. It was a sunny day in real life and in our hearts. I then looked over and saw him. Brock Lesnar was there staring out from the woods behind our house. I blinked and then he was in front of me. He handed me the card you see above. He winked, smirked, and in another blink of the eye he was gone. I’m truly proud to say that he is The Sexy Wrestler of The Week. Thank you, Brock Lesnar. Thank you.

    This Or That (3/11/2015)

    Everybody loves binary decisions, especially wrestling fans! In This Or That, we’ve forced ourselves to choose between two options that relate to wrestling.

    Over four questions, @TimWelcomed, @JoeySplashwater and @TomBlargh will have to choose one of two options and give their reasoning on each of their choices. You can then vote on which one you’d choose, giving you the false impression that you’re somehow involved and we care about your opinion chance to join the conversation!

    Before we start, here’s last week‘s results:

    Worst choice for a Wrestlemania main event?

    Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania 31 – 82%, The Miz at Wrestlemania 27 – 18%

    More embarrassing in 2015?

    Chris Jericho – 91%, TNA – 9%

    Blue Pants?

    Yay – 79%, Nay – 21%

    Better Brad Ward wordplay?

    Brad Van Dam – 78%, Braddy Roode – 22%

    Will Wrestlemania 31 be the worst Wrestlemania of the last 15 years: Yes or No?

    Times are not great.

    wm

    Tim:

    There have been a lot of bad Wrestlemanias so being the worst of them all is quite the challenge but I believe it very well could be. Take into account all of the incredible talent on the roster, what the card could have been, what the card should have been, and the fact that WWE has done this THIRTY fucking times already and still can muck it up this badly. On paper there are a probably only three matches that should be good and should deliver but knowing the current WWE climate I do not have any hope. I don’t think I’ve ever been more disinterested and in WWE, much less a Wrestlemania, and as I said before there have been some abysmal Wrestlemanias. It’s been a very disheartening road to Wrestlemania.

    Yes

    Joey:

    This comes down to one thing in answering this question – do I think any match on this show will be remembered as great years from now? Every Wrestlemania of the last 15 years has had at least one of those to me, even the weaker ones.

    The ladder match should steal the show but that’s just a spotfest. Sting/Triple H should be memorable for the entrances and finish but I doubt Sting can be in a great overall match that you can watch dozens of times in your life. John Cena/Rusev is the top choice and I just don’t see it happening. This card sucks and I think the show is going to be a train wreck.

    Yes

    Tom:

    In terms of match quality, it seems destined to be the worst since the ’90s, but in terms of entertainment… man, it could be something special. There’s the possibility of the crowd turning on the show in a really vicious way, which I’m excited for. At the very least, I don’t think it’ll be a boring Wrestlemania, which is enough to keep it from being classified as the worst of the last 15 years (WRESTLEMANIA 27, COME ON DOWN!)

    No

    Will Wrestlemania 31 be the worst Wrestlemania of the last 15 years?

    • Yes (54%, 32 Votes)
    • No (46%, 27 Votes)

    Total Voters: 59

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    Dirt Sheet History: August 2008

    Take a trip back to a memorable timeline in sports entertainment with the most important stories reported as fact in the journalistic world of pro wrestling dirt sheets.

    Following the timeline of the last Dirt Sheet History looking back at July 2008, we get a glimpse into the top scoops from August of 2008 as we read Dirt Sheet History.

    Reminder that you can find all past editions of Dirt Sheet History looking at 2004 through 2007 right here. Now enjoy August 2008.

    august

    8/1/2008

    * Brock Lesnar said he wouldn’t rule out a possible return to the pro wrestling ring one day. However, he said it would take a lot of money to entice him to return.

    8/2/2008

    * Kevin Nash walked out of the Impact taping on Wednesday night due to a booking decision he wasn’t pleased with. On next week’s Impact, TNA will be holding yet another Gauntlet “Royal Rumble” style 10-man match. Nash was scheduled to participate in the match and get eliminated during a commercial break, which he thought was stupid. He then walked out on the taping. Nonetheless, they worked things out afterwards and he’s still affiliated with the company.

    8/3/2008

    * The original storyline plan was for CM Punk to go heel, and then win the title via Money in the Bank. The suggestion for Punk to win the title in a fluke-like fashion didn’t go over too well at first, but arguments were made that since WWE decided on a youth movement and to shake things up, that Punk is the guy to push more than anyone else in the company. An argument made in Punk’s favor is that he is more popular than he should have been given his push, not to mention that he sells far more merchandise than someone in his position should. Since Vince McMahon gave the green light for Punk to win the title, everyone in creative is suddenly 100% behind him.

    On the other hand, the road agent/”producers” were very quiet about the move as many of them don’t think highly of Punk’s work. However, none of them will ever speak out against a Vince direction for fear of losing their job. Behind the scenes, Triple H, who has not been a supporter of Punk dating back to his arrival in the company, recently joked that Shawn Michaels will need to heel so Punk can have someone who can work him through a world title match.

    The directive of Punk often not looking too strong on television is from Vince. Vince believes that by making Punk cling onto the belt against “better” guys, it will cause fans to get behind him in the long run. This was the very same idea he had with Rey Mysterio, although Vince was never behind him as anything but a transitional champion.

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    ScoopZone Elite: March 9, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for The Week of March 9, 2015

    WWE

    • WWE still pays a team of humans to write their shows even though it doesn’t seem like anyone from Earth could come up with this stuff.

     

    • Fandango has been constantly warning Curtis Axel to not get too excited about the “Axelmania” momentum.

     

    • Activision has been in contact with WWE to use Erick Rowan’s theme in their dark and gritty reboot of Crash Bandicoot

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    TNA

    • Over the weekend Drew Galloway took over the official Impact Wrestling social media accounts to ask the fans what they want from TNA so that the fans would think they actually have a voice. We can confirm that Taz continuously direct messaged this picture with the message “said it before I’ll say it again: they need to use this.”

     

    • Low Ki‘s ear almost fell off last week due to not throwing a temper tantrum in almost a year.

     

    • Tommy Dreamer isn’t technically employed by TNA. He just shows up and goes to the ring every week.


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    Exclusive photo of this year’s Cage of Death

    Other

    • Jim Ross doesn’t understand why women, minorities, homosexuals or transgenders complain so much these days.

     

    • Jeff Jarrett will be launching a Kickstarter to get GFW off of the ground. Top pledges will be guaranteed a pack of guitar strings and a $20 Applebee’s gift card.

     

    • Lance Storm saved and sold Adam “Edge” Copeland‘s hair on Ebay.

     

    Top 10 Potential Wrestlemania Chants During Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

    Let’s face it. It’s going to get ugly.

    wm

    If Royal Rumble was bad, imagine 50,000 fans with a large portion of the attendees being diehard wrestling fans traveling from all around the world. The best case for the WWE is that the acoustics in the building are off or it’s hard to get chants heard on TV in such a large stadium. There’s no scenario in which the fans at Wrestlemania 31 accept this match without attempts to “hijack” the show and entertain themselves, especially if Brock Lesnar is leaving the WWE following this match and it leaks.

    I wanted to find a way to make a game out of this to find some form of entertainment for myself when watching Wrestlemania. I’m not sure if there’s one I can make out of it aside from the tired cliche of a shot game but here’s the 10 most interesting possible chants.

    1. Daniel Bryan

    The obvious and most likely chant. A large portion of WWE fans don’t want to quit on the Daniel Bryan dreams no matter how many times WWE tries to erase him from relevancy as a Wyatt lackey or an opening match ladder climber. With the way Royal Rumble went, fans are more prone to being self aware and knowing what makes TV. I can see a scenario where there’s one 20 minute long “Daniel Bryan” chant throughout the entire match.

    2. CM Punk

    The opposite road to the Daniel Bryan chant. If the show is ugly before the main event, fans may be in a more bitter mood and a chant that would be more hostile than “Daniel Bryan” is the never forgotten “CM Punk.” No word yet on if WWE will sue Colt Cabana for the Punk chants.

    Conversely, this may be the time the trolling fans get an AJ Lee chant going as a humorous turn from all the times CM Punk was chanted during her matches.

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    This Or That (3/5/2015)

    Everybody loves binary decisions, especially wrestling fans! In This Or That, we’ve forced ourselves to choose between two options that relate to wrestling.

    Over four questions, @TimWelcomed, @JoeySplashwater and @TomBlargh will have to choose one of two options and give their reasoning on each of their choices. You can then vote on which one you’d choose, giving you the false impression that you’re somehow involved and we care about your opinion chance to join the conversation!

    Before we start, here’s last week‘s results:

    Who are you more interested to see at Wrestlemania?

    Sting – 67%, The Undertaker – 33%

    Where do you think Samoa Joe will end up?

    NJPW – 98%, NXT – 2% (Biggest difference in This Or That history. Wow were we wrong!)

    More exciting Wrestlemania match potential?

    Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton – 59%, Intercontinental title match – 41% (This was voted on when it looked like Ziggler vs. Barrett vs. Ambrose vs. R-Truth.)

    Better weird 90’s music artist?

    Fred Durst – 64%, Carson Daly – 36%

    Worse choice for Wrestlemania main event: The Miz at Wrestlemania 27 or Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania 31?

    Which is truly worse?

    reignsmiz

    Tim:

    This is a hard one. I personally believe The Miz is the worst. Just the absolute worst. Both guys do have their fans though. Disgusting isn’t it? Both were forced upon us and were/are believed to be something they are not by WWE management. I do get what WWE sees in Reigns. He is just their type. It’s sad that it is that way and I will never be happy with it but it is what it is. In the end, I think every time WWE makes an inorganic decision from so far within its own ass like they are doing it gets worse and worse. Roman Reigns is a bore and I hate he’s getting to beat Lesnar. The streak ended for this, ya know? Anyway, fuck ’em. A lot of fans seem really defeated lately. It’s pretty disappointing.

    Roman Reigns

    Joey:

    Look, I know Roman Reigns sucks and quite frankly Miz probably is/was better than him but Miz was by far a worse choice. At least you can see WWE and many fans do believe there’s potential in Reigns to be a future top star in the industry. With Miz, it was easy to predict how far he would fall going forward. Sure, he had some momentum (aka any new heel to the main event picture facing John Cena) but homeboy had no business in that main event, especially over CM Punk that year.

    The Miz

    Tom:

    I don’t think Miz was ready for his WWE title run and ‘Mania main event but I think taking a punt on him was at least worth a shot. He was never a particularly good wrestler but he’s always been incredibly hateable and I can understand pitting him against Cena at a time when they still weren’t sure how to handle the negative reactions he was getting.

    It was misguided, but I think there was still a certain bravery about going with Miz that year and trying to push a new guy who was getting a decent ctowd reaction, whereas the Roman Reigns push just seems completely insane, forced and contrary to all logic.

    Roman Reigns

    Worse choice for Wrestlemania main event

    • Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania 31 (82%, 61 Votes)
    • The Miz at Wrestlemania 27 (18%, 13 Votes)

    Total Voters: 74

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    Sexy Wrestler of The Week

    We are here to show the world how to name The Sexy Wrestler of The Week!

    The votes have been counted so hard. I counted the votes like I have never counted before. I kicked out my roommate and decided it was time I got serious about this. I counted every vote four times to make sure this was all done right so here we are. LET’S DO THIS.

    SWOTWDolph

    Dolph Ziggler is The Sexy Wrestler of The Week. He is no stranger to this prize. He has climbed the ladder to your hearts before and this proves he is still within us all. Speaking of ladders, Dolph Ziggler will be in a ladder match for the Intercontinental Championship at Wrestlemania. He has had quite the history with ladders. We should take a quick look.

    DolphOnLadder2
    Dolph Ziggler has cut promos atop ladders. Bravery.

    DolphOnLadder
    Dolph Ziggler has won Money In The Bank by climbing a ladder. Power.

    DolphOnLadder3
    Dolph Ziggler has won the Intercontinental Championship in a ladder match. Persistence.

    DolphOnLadder4
    Dolph Ziggler has carried an open ladder on his head during his entrance. Balance.

    DolphFrenchBraid
    Plus, he has a pretty sweet French braid. That is a French braid, right? I’m pretty sure it is. He may be awful at Twitter but he sure is a great pick for this week. Good job to all of you. I’m proud to be apart of this momentous occasion.