• Monthly Archives: January 2015

    Sexy Wrestler of The Week: Mortdecai Edition

    Pre-Order your tickets for Mortdecai while we name The Sexy Wrestler of The Week!


    “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn!”

    – Rhett Butler (Clark Gable) in Gone With The Wind (1939)


    “Nobody puts Baby in a corner.”

    – Johnny Castle (Patrick Swayze) in Dirty Dancing (1987)


    “What we’ve got here is a failure to communicate.”

    – Luke (Paul Newman) in Cool Hand Luke (1976)


    “I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?”

    – Jack Byrnes (Robert DeNiro) in Meet The Parents (2000)


    “Today, we celebrate our Independence Day.”

    – President Thomas J. Whitmore (Bill Pullman) in Independence Day (1996)

    Those are the five greatest quotes ever spoken in cinematic HISTORY. We can all AGREE on this. Today, I want to bring up a future classic that we will all be quoting for decades to come and probably already say every week! This is a line from a movie that is on the tip of everyone’s tongue. You hear a buzz? It’s probably coming from this movie.

    MortdecaiSWOTW

    “They’re naming The Sexy Wrestler of The Week today.”
    – Charles Mortdecai (Johnny Depp) in Mortdecai (2015)

    The Sexy Wrestler of the Week is such a prestigious award that now the Hollywood elite are talking about it in movies! But this one isn’t just any movie, it is without a doubt a contender for an instant classic! You want to know more about this upcoming hit movie? Well here is a quick synopsis:

    “Art dealer Charles Mortdecai searches for a stolen painting that’s reportedly linked to a lost bank account filled with Nazi gold. This is not anything like The Pink Panther so quit saying that.”

    Mortdecai will hit theaters on January 23, 2014 and features Johnny Depp, Ewan McGregor, and Olivia Munn. More Mortdecai please!

    With that out of the way (yet Mortdecai Fever is still going at full blast) we will now name this week’s winner!

    AJLSWOTWMortdecai

    There you have it! AJ Lee is The Sexy Wrestler of The Week! In case you don’t know, all of the promotional posters for Mortdecai have various characters in the movie wearing Mortdecai’s precious mustache!

    I find it hilarious and get a genuine laugh every time I see one of these people with that damned zany mustache. That movie will for sure be a laugh-a-minute romp and you should all see it! I know I will be seeing it when I get back from my cruise.

    I have recently come into some extra cash and will be away for the next three weeks. Don’t worry though. That won’t stop me from naming The Sexy Wrestler of The Week! Be sure to vote and maybe even write in your personal review of Mortdecai when you do. I know you’ll love it.

    Top 10 Wrestlers of the Year 2014

    Time to rank the best wrestlers of the year.

    Fresh off of our Year End Awards Extravaganza, we decided to create a panel to compile a list of our Top 10 Wrestlers of the Year. Five regular Wrestling On Earth contributors ranked their top 15 wrestlers of 2014 using whatever criteria they determine makes one “Wrestler of the Year.” The criteria is completely subjective to each person.

    To get on the list, you have to be on 3+ panel member lists and then we’d do simple math of who had the highest rankings to see how it played out.

    The panel:

    Honorable mentions: Brock Lesnar and Adam Cole just missed the list as they were on three lists but didn’t quite crack the top 10.

    10. Daniel Bryan

    bryan

    Tom:

    Even though he was absent for such a good chunk of the year, his story made for the best Wrestlemania in a decade and his announcement that he’ll be back in 2015 is such a relief. Raw’s gotten to the point where there’s only a handful of performers I actively look forward to, and Bryan’s absence made the show a really rough watch for a while – even with guys like Rollins and Cesaro and so on, there was a point where Bryan would be wrestling a couple of matches every show and he was always excellent. He’s just special, y’know?

    Brad:

    Daniel Bryan started the year in a position that was some what undesirable to say the least. It may have been perhaps the plan all along to put Bryan in his spot he ended up having at Wrestlemania. One thing that I will say about Bryan is he is the one guy who was involved in some of the most memorable moments of the year in my opinion.

    Bell to bell, there are few guys who truly work harder in those 3 ropes (not four) than Daniel Bryan. While Bryan’s 2014 was cut short, the intensity he brings and the level he connects with the fans makes him very worthy in the top 10.

    Deathlock:

    DBry is on my list in spite of missing half the year. You all probably know the story — he defeated Triple H at Wrestlemania XXX to get a shot at the WWE World Heavyweight Championship (Bryan vs. Triple H was my favorite WWE match of the year). He won that match, and later in the night defeated Batista AND Randy Orton to capture the championship. That is freaking magical. A whole arena full of nothing but love for their favorite wrestler finally getting what they think he deserves after a years-long buildup. That’s one reason why wrestling is great, and one reason why Bryan is so high on my list for 2014. His recent promo on Raw announcing his entry into the 2015 Royal Rumble makes it even better. 2014 is not the end!

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    ScoopZone Elite: January 5, 2015

    We’ve consulted our inside sources to bring you the best and most EXCLUSIVE dirt on your favorite wrestling promotions from around the world. Unlike other sites, we’ll only bring you 100% accurate and truthful wrestling news every week. We’re still working on our paywall, so please only read these stories if you’re an elite member.

    [WELCOME ELITE MEMBERS. THANK YOU FOR THE SUBSCRIPTION!]

    News for The Week of January 5, 2015

    WWE

    • Those close to Natalya are worried that her eating a pot brownie will lead to her trying out harder types of brownies such as German chocolate or red velvet.

     

    • Billy Kidman started the small “Roman sucks” chants on RAW a few weeks ago to celebrate his birthday.

     

    • Rapper RiFF RAFF continues to tease a WWE appearance. Nothing is official as Triple H is still scouring the internet to see if this signing would help him get another fruit basket.

    -Advertisement-

    TNASignsGuy1

    TNA

    • TNA re-signed Jesse Godderz, Mr. Anderson and many other wrestlers that you’d assume were already signed if you actually cared about them.

     

    • Destination America will be inducted into the TNA Hall of Fame at the next Bound For Glory.

     

    • Kurt Angle is very excited to moonsault off the cage at TNA’s Lockdown tapings this week.


    -Sponsored Links-

    The overall reaction to the current WWE product revealed. CLICK HERE!

    Other

    • Chris Jericho will be moderating a debate between Eric Bischoff and Bruce Prichard for RF Video. Fans will be unable to press charges unless they know which of the listed names pick-pocketed them.

     

    • Mick Foley really believes he is turning into Santa Claus.

     

    • Lance Storm doesn’t think Shinsuke Nakamura is extraordinarily sexy.

     

     

    Seven Things: 7 Bold Predictions For 2015

    Welcome to Seven Things, a list that consists of very eclectic topics. It happens once in a while when inspiration hits.

    Quick thing – A friend of a friend is a friend and someone is in need of some help. A friend of mine is trying to help out someone with some unfortunate luck and in need during a very difficult time. Please take a look and if you can help, please do. Here’s the link – CLICK HERE.

    Wrestling thing – It’s 2015! 2014 was one of the most bizarre years in wrestling history. CM Punk left WWE, a “fan movement” pushed Daniel Bryan into the Wrestlemania main event, Alberto Del Rio was fired for slapping a racist employee, AJ Styles made TNA look like fools, Sting (in a t-shirt) joined WWE, Kevin Steen (in a t-shirt) joined WWE, NJPW became relevant to American wrestling fans, ROH took steps forward (namely gaining PPV) and TNA took steps backwards (namely losing PPV).

    Hey yo: If you have any suggestions for future lists or topics you’d care to hear my opinion on, feel free to share them in the comments or send them to me on Twitter: @JoeySplashwater

    7. Neither Dolph Ziggler or Dean Ambrose will have a singles main event on PPV

    zigglerambrose

    Sad to say but the babyface pecking order is getting to be a tough climb. There’s the constant John Cena, a returning Daniel Bryan, a soon to be returning Randy Orton and WWE’s Christmas wish of a baby face Roman Reigns. Dolph Ziggler and Dean Ambrose are clearly below those four and I can’t see getting over those hurdles. You can turn them heel as the only current top villains are Seth Rollins and Brock Lesnar with the latter likely leaving. The problem is their highest stock are due to the babyface runs. Ziggler is currently doing the best work of his career and Ambrose was built as a decent merch-mover when hitting on all cylinders as a face while feuding with Seth Rollins.

    Every year around Wrestlemania season, a few wrestlers get lost in the shuffle and have a hard timing getting back to where they were at the start of the year. I think both guys will have significant roles but I can’t see them getting back to the main event status like the Autumn of 2014. I have a little more faith in Ambrose due to his ceiling but you’d have assumed he’d be treated like a bigger deal after his great run in the August-October months if the hopes were higher.

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    Wrestling With Food: Jericho Doodles

    The WWF Cookbook is a treasure trove of crazy recipes from the Attitude Era, each of which is purportedly the creation of one of the wrestlers. In Wrestling With Food, Sydney is on a mission to try cooking all of them to see if any are actually edible.

    Happy New Year, my little buttery crumpets! Are you ready for another recipe review featuring a few scattered, poorly lit images and hidden text? Let’s begin!

    doodles-600

    Okay, so here’s the truth. I’m annoyed that they gave the delicious snickerdoodle to Jericho for Jericho Doodles: “Doodles Are Jericho”. I realize at the time when this fantastic cookbook was actually published, he was a bigger deal and more fun. I absolutely remember how exciting his entrance was when I would watch wrestling then, but now… well, he’s a guy who seems decidedly less excited about wrestling. Nowadays, he’ll do a perfectly FINE AMA on Reddit but is he the Keanu Reeves of the AMA? He is not.

    What I’m saying is, today’s Jericho kind of deserves a corn bread recipe. A chicken soup recipe, maybe. Meatloaf? I dunno. But snickerdoodles are my second favorite type of cookie, and I sort of resented buying my umpteenth bottle of cream of tartar in the name of Chris Jericho and/or Fozzie. SORRY FOR THIS CONTROVERSIAL OPINION.

    Sidenote: I watched Cursed on Netflix the other day (whatever, it was New Year’s Day and I apologize for nothing) and I thought Fozzie was the opening band. Nope! It was Bowling For Soup. Am I doing a disservice to Fozzie or to Bowling For Soup? You decide.

    But let’s get going. As usual, here are the ingredients! And guys, guess how many (different) pictures I of the following items on my phone? If I do a WWF Cookbook dessert recipe, I automatically grab two sticks of butter before even looking at the rest of the list.

    doodle-ingredients

    The ingredients:

    3 ¾ cups flour

    ½ teaspoon baking soda

    ½ teaspoon salt

    ½ cream of tartar

    1 cup (2 sticks) butter

    2 cups plus 3 tablespoons sugar

    2 eggs

    ¼ cup milk

    1 teaspoon vanilla

    1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

    Nothing crazy here. This is a perfectly standard snickerdoodle recipe. I do think they were a little low on the cinnamon but more on that later.

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    Sexy Wrestler of The Week

    It is a new year but what really matters is The Sexy Wrestler of The Week.

    If you’re anything like me you’re waking up from a nap because you had a long night. The difference between us is that you’re wondering who the first Sexy Wrestler of The Week of the year is and I already know because I am the vote counter. That is all I do. I have no life because I want to bring this amazing award to all of you every week. It’s not about me but I would like some respect or at least a “thank you.” 2015 is the year I get my much deserved respect for this important job.

    Maybe I’m just stressed. This is the first year we will not have a Sexy Wrestler of The Year but it just didn’t seem right after finding out the votes were being tampered with by my former intern that I had hired from Reddit. This has been a truly disgusting year and I will work relentlessly to remove the ugly blemish from this once prestigious award.

    Now that I’ve released that from atop my chest let us get into it. Let’s get to the business. Let us talk of the deal. The very first Sexy Wrestler of The Week of 2015 is a newcomer to the award and it couldn’t have happened at a better time as this wrestler is known to love New Years. I’m just glad I get to point this fun fact out before anyone else on the internet does. You have NO clue who it is.

    SWOTWBigShow

    Now you know who it is. The Big Show cements himself as one of the elite as he is The Sexy Wrestler of The Week. You voted and I counted. This is a thing you did so you should be happy. Democracy and all of that. I found this picture of The Big Show that you have never seen. Ever. Yeah, YOU’RE WELCOME.